Hello everyone! I hope that all is well in Blog land and in all of your lives outside of here. In the past month I have heard of so many new blessings of new additions to families with more to come! Geez you people are getting Biz-Zay. I am so happy and excited for everyone and can’t wait for that day to come for me. During these times I start having a mental debate, ping ponging thoughts and reservations around in this little brain of my. Hence my title, “The Great Debate”.
Maybe it’s a girl thing of not being able to make up our minds but one day I want a baby and the next I am thankful I have the freedom to do whatever I want. UGH, I wish the decision came easier and that hormones, family pressures, and my own wants and needs could just “Fall into place”.
I am 28 years old, married for 3.5 years now, have a great job, and amazing things happening in my life.
I have been given the opportunity at work to go through a year long Emerging Leaders Institute which allows me to travel 5 times this year, go to Washington D.C to advocate for TRiO Program funding, and to enhance my leadership skills and networking through this process.
In February, I get to travel to Las Vegas, NV for an additional training and my husband and I will get to go to Belgium for his work (If we get our passports in time).
In May, where going to Omaha for a weekend away. We can literally pick up at the drop of a hat and go, go go!
I suppose when I think of all this opportunity coming my way I get worried about my life choices. I want to be a mommy. I know I am going to be GREAT at it! But everyone I talk to in my job world keeps saying, “Wait on it Brittany, the opportunities in front of you right now are here and with a family it may be harder to do these things.'” Then I’ve got the family, friends, and my other part of the brain telling me that I am ready to make this commitment.
I don’t want to be the OLD mommy that waited longer to start a family but on the other hand do I want to surpass my work opportunities… I’m only 28.
Here’s the other thing, I know that I can have a balance between both worlds BUT if NOT having a child at this moment in time allowed me to fulfill my opportunities in my career shouldn’t I wait longer.
I suppose the question is very open ended and leaves me no better off then when I started writing this.
Maybe I will have that magical epiphany that so many people tell me about, “You will just know its the right time”.
If only the decision could be that easy.
Was it easy to move to South Dakota and eventually, Iowa? No. Did you have to sort of "reconfigure" your career and life plans? Yes. Has every day of marriage been smiles and sunshine? No. But, you knew you were ready to jump into the unknown with an open mind and open heart because you wanted to get married and start that chapter in life. You made some sacrifices but also gained and learned a lot in your experience and life has constantly surprised you ever since. You've "simply adapted" =). I kind of see your current situation in the same way. Will it be easy to be a mom and a successful career woman? Not always. Will you have to "reconfigure" your day to day life? Yes. Will everyday of raising a child be smiles and sunshine? Probably not. And when you and your husband decide that you're ready to take on a new type of unknown, then you'll start that chapter in life too.
ReplyDeleteYou give your own perfect advice right there on your blog "Do what makes you happy not what is always convenient."
Try not to let outside pressures affect your decision (easier said than done!). This is something that only you and your husband can decide because the two of you are the only ones that know if your lives are ready for some sacrifices and surprises, just like with marriage. If you're both ready for that, then go for it, and tackle each challenge as it comes. If not, no matter your age, or how long you've been married, or your career choice, there is nothing wrong with not being ready, and don't let anyone convince you otherwise.
I am in a very similar situation so I have been loving these posts. So. Hard. To. Be. Sure. You. Are. Doing. The. Right. Thing. !!!!
ReplyDeleteI am no good at advice with this because we much as we "thought" we had an idea of when we wanted kids the Lord had other plans in both instances. I do think, though, that there really is never a "good" time or a "right" time. There will always be something holding you back or making you think you should wait! :)
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